Self-Destruction Blues by Hanoi Rocks (1982)
Title:
A great title made all the more appropriate by the fact that this album kind of sounds like it’s in the process of self-destructing as you listen to it.
Album Art:
We have a classic shot of the boys looking like a thrift store threw up all over them here – good stuff. Drummer Razzle is also featured on the cover despite not actually playing on the album.
Overall:
To quote a (drummer) friend of mine upon introducing him to this record, “this is the only song I’ve ever heard where the drummer is off time”. This whole album truly sounds like it’s just barely holding together – and yet it works. I should note that this not an album in the traditional sense, but rather a collection of singles recorded by the band during 1981 and 1982. The ad hoc nature of singles thrown together instead of the intentional recording of an album contributes to the overall sense of chaos you get listening to this one. I should also make extremely clear that absolutely none of this is intended as a criticism, I love this record and the always-endearing ridiculousness of nearly everything this band has ever done. Not only do I love the (intentional or not) kids-fucking-around-with-recording-equipment vibe, but this is a genuinely good record. Hanoi Rocks make a great introduction to hair metal for the non-believers because there’s still a lot of punk DNA in their music and this collection has something for everyone – there’s primal-scream yelling, there’s sloppy drum fills, there’s cocaine, and there’s horse noises plus its all the more fun because it sounds like they’re just making it up as they go.
Track By Track:
1. Love’s An Injection
This album starts off with a great bass-driven swing, the most 80’s-sounding drums you’ve ever heard in your life, and a fun doo-wop-esque chorus. The guitar really shines on this one too, especially in the back half of the track and we even get a slick little solo from guitarist Andy McCoy. The lyrics don’t really make a lot of sense, but they are catchy as hell and I found myself humming this one all day after listening through the record for this review.
2. I Want You
Track two is one of the more polished-sounding in the lineup and it kicks off with what I’d have to call the most “classic rock” intro on this record. I get a very Aerosmith-type vibe from the opening few seconds until Mike Monroe’s inimitable Finnish-meets-cockney accent kicks in and reminds you who you’re listening to. He has this amazing kind of sloppy-drunk sounding snarl on some these songs – just listen to how he slurs his way through the “electric guitaaaarrrrr” line in this one. Mr. Monroe also provides this song with an excellent sax solo around the two-minute mark.
3. Café Avenue
I once saw a taped interview of Mike Monroe from back in the day wherein he heavily implied that he prostituted himself in order to fund the recording of some early singles in his music career. I can’t really verify how true that is, or if this this song is necessarily about that – but it feels like it. The lighter, almost Cure-esque with those whispery trail-offs, vocals on this one help convey the story of a wild life and the tone is somewhere between nostalgic and rueful. It feels like the narrator (whether it’s meant to be Mike or he’s playing a character) is happy to have gotten out and left his past behind, and is now at the point where he can reminisce on his past somewhat fondly.
4. Nothing New
Nothing New gives us the first taste of Hanoi Rock’s punk heritage on the album with lyrics like “Coca-Cola (propaganda!)” and hammered-out power chords. It’s more produced-sounding than might be expected on this kind of track, but combined with the clap-along outro that smooth sound in contrast to the lyrics comes off sounding sarcastic which adds an extra dose of punky snark. Like most of the songs from this band, this one does not overstay its welcome and fades out just over the three minute with some great yelps to close it down.
5. Kill City Kills
This is definitely the most guitar-centric song on the record so far, and McCoy makes full use of it to show off some really interesting tones. The drums are interesting too with a vaguely “world music” kind of vibe. Lyrically this another alone-in-the-big-city-welcome-to-the-jungle-freakout, although this is not the Hanoi Rocks tune that allegedly inspired the GnR version.
6. Self-Destruction Blues
This title track sometimes just rides that line between being music and being noise and I love every minute of it. This is the sound of a Finnish glam-metal band trying to imitate Muddy Waters in somebody’s dad’s garage and it is both so weird and so awesome. There’s a janky, discordant guitar backed by heavy hitting drums and what sounds to me like some harmonica in the background. I don’t know what kind of effect they’re using on Monroe’s vocals here, but it sounds like he’s coming through a scratchy old radio transmission which feels like a call-back to the song’s old-school bluesy origins.
7. Beer and A Cigarette
The boys really rev up through the intro on this one and set a faster more up-tempo pace for the rest of the song. I love that you can almost hear the guitar racing the drums during the break on this one. Who knows who’s setting the pace and who cares cause we’re all having good time.
8. Whispers in the Dark
I’d have to guess that Whispers in the Dark was recorded later than some of the other tracks because it has the most classic 80s sound that we get in this collection. Its not a particular standout for me, other than the fact that there is something that reminds me of an 80s horror movie soundtrack to the synth and it makes me want to see a music video of the band in full stage outfits running from some poorly-lit slime monster.
9. Taxi Driver
This song, above all others on the record, is peak this-band-is-falling-apart-as-the-song-goes-on. The instruments sound like they’re barely hanging on to the timing by their fingernails, with the bass just managing to keep everybody together. Taxi Driver also graces your earholes with Mike Monroe’s sloppiest, snarliest vocal lines right from the intro where we get a killer howl to start things off. The lyrics are a little questionable – I probably don’t want to know what “you can milk me if you want to” means, but this one is a candidate for my favourite on the record because it just sounds like so much fun. That last little cymbal spank on the heels of the final vocal line is hilarious and such a great ending.
10. Desperados
Have you ever wondered what it would sound like if a bunch of dudes from Finland did an ungodly amount of cocaine and then recorded the most hilarious rendition of the 80s Cowboy Song (à la Wanted Dead Or Alive) ever made? Well wonder no more dear reader, because Hanoi Rocks have the answer and even for this album it’s a weird one. This little ditty starts off with the sounds of a building being demolished and then brings in the swinging guitar and some light yodeling. There’s gunshot sounds and whip-cracks all over the place and the whole thing ends off with horse noises. Now, I mentioned Bon Jovi earlier because he is the rightful king of the 80s Cowboy Song with heartfelt ballads like Blaze of Glory and the aforementioned Wanted Dead or Alive – this song is not that. Throughout the song there’s this almost cartoonishly-upbeat guitar track under quick-fire lyrics like “bank robbery is your life” making this the least pretentious and most self-aware variant on this particular theme.
11. Problem Child
We’re back on that punk shit both sonically and lyrics-wise for Problem Child, which is both a relief and giving me whiplash after Desperados. They’re in and out of this one in two minutes with just enough time to show off some killer drums and for Mike Monroe to scream “problem” about fifty times.
12. Dead By X-mas
The lyrics on Dead By X-Mas are decidedly dark, but the delivery is upbeat and almost comedic making this a weirdly fun song about murder. While you can’t expect as much story telling from a collection of singles as you would from a traditional album, this feels like a satisfying ending.